6 Things To Stop Apologizing For

Apologizing when we have hurt somebody or have done something wrong is absolutely necessary in order to repair the social fabric that keeps us all positively connected. But saying sorry for anything else invalidates us, gives others the impression that we are less capable, and reinforces feelings of low self-worth. "Sorry" takes up airtime that should be used for making logical, declarative statements, expressing opinions and relaying accurate impressions of what we want.

Breaking the habit of apologizing for anything and everything isn't easy. But here are 6 things you start with and stop apologizing for.

1. What you eat
"Sorry, I'm going to be bad and order a cheeseburger". "I'm sorry, I can't eat that- I don't eat meat"- or the flip side- "I know you're vegetarian, can I order  burger though?". Whether you are a salad loving, juicing, vegetarian or a burger and fries type of person, what you put into your body is nobody's business. And don't apologize for your dietary restrictions whether they be health related or a personal choice. Some people are criticized for eating poorly and others (as I have been several times) are judged for their "overly" healthy eating habits.

2. How you are dressed
"I'm sorry I am such a mess. I'm just so tired today". "Ugh. I feel so overdressed compared to everyone else". Stop apologizing for being over-dressed, under-dressed, for not wearing enough clothing, or for dressing in an "unconventional" way that expresses who you are. I am not saying you should roll into work in sweatpants or that you should wear your pajamas in public. But if you throw on leggings because you're tired, having a bad day, are feeling lazy, don't apologize for "looking like a mess". If you are one who likes to get dressed regardless of your plans and will wear your best outfit to the grocery store, don't apologize for it. Being who you are doesn't require an apology.

3. Stating your feelings 
"I'm sorry but I feel.....". "I don't mean to make a fuss but that really annoys me".
Telling people what you think and feel is a responsibility in any relationship. By letting someone know how you feel, you’re helping that person understand you and if you don't state your position and your feelings about any given thing, the other person will never know and cannot be blamed for hurting or angering you down the road. Don't apologize for stating your feelings. You are entitled to them. This doesn't mean your pour it all out whenever the urge strikes, but telling someone you don't like something, don't agree with something or that your feelings are hurt is perfectly warranted. When we apologize for our feelings, whether we are hurt or excited over something we are passionate about, we minimize ourselves in a misguided attempt to protect others.

4. Other people's behavior
Why do we apologize when someone bumps into us on the street? As a formality? Because we think we are being polite? It's not your fault so don't apologize. If the other person apologizes, fine, but nothing is required from you. If you feel uncomfortable, a simple "excuse me" will do. The same idea pertains to all of the other behaviors that other people are responsible for that have nothing to do with you. If you didn't do anything wrong, don't apologize. Sometimes we like to apologize for things we didn't do to simply smooth things over with someone. Don't Just be responsible for yourself and let everyone else do the same.

5. Having an opinion
"I'm sorry you feel that way but I don't think I did anything wrong". "I'm sorry but I don't agree".
Don't agree with something someone is saying? State your own views and don't be sorry about it. Period.

5. Your health and your body

People tend to have something to say whether you are curvy or skinny. If you're curvy, you eat too much of the wrong stuff. If you're skinny, you don't eat enough of the right stuff. The fact is, your health is up to you and whether you are rounder or skinner, everyone has a different size and body weight they are comfortable with. Speaking of health, whether you're just feeing under the weather or have health problems that cause you to have less energy or whatever it might be, there is absolutely no need to apologize. Just skip the  "I'm sorry, I'm not myself today" or "I'm sorry I can't keep up".

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